Why skiing in Switzerland is crazy

Do you ski? Do you remember when you stood on your skis for the first time?
I hope it wasn't as dramatic as in this story.

Möchtisch go Schii fahre?
Do you want to go skiing?

Jo, Schii fahre gseht cool uus, aber ...
Yes, skiing looks so cool, but ...

Ok, denn pack dini Sache, mir gönd go Schii miete.
Ok, pack your things, we go to rent skis.

Grossartig! Ich fröie mi scho druf, aber ...
Great! I am looking forward to it, but ...

OBE UF EM BÄRG BI DE SCHWARZE PISCHTE:
​On the top of the mountain,  black slope:

Bisch parat, Schätzeli?
Are you ready, love?

Jo, aber isch Schii fahre schwirig?
Yes, but is skiing difficult?

Nei, mach s eifach so wie-n-ich. Das isch es Chinderschpil.
No, just do as I do. It's easy.

Liebling, wart. Mini Schii fahred mer devo!
Honey, wait. My skis drive off under my feet!

Schätzeli, ich fahre scho wiiter. Du fahrsch so langsam, dass i no verfrüüre. 
Honey, I already go on driving. You're so slow, I'll freeze.

Hilfe! Wart!
Help! Wait!

Du,  ich ha drü Schtund bruucht, bis i wider dunde gsi bi!
You! I needed three hours until I was back down again!

Eis Glück, ha-n-i mi nid meh verletzt!
Luckily I haven't hurt myself more.

Ich ha nur chli Büüle.
​I only have some bruises.

Ich bi so verruckt uf dich!
I am so mad at you!

Aber Schätzeli ... Ich ha dänkt, du möchtisch go Schii fahre.
But honey... I thought you wanted to go skiing.

Das isch nümm wichtig. 
That's not important any more.

Du bisch verantwortigslos und du hesch mi lo sitze! 
You are irresponsible and you left me in the lurch! 

Ich mache Schluss mit dir!
​That's the end of our relationship!